Signs of a Cheating Spouse
If you're concerned that your spouse might be unfaithful, it can nag at you day and night. You might wonder the right steps to take to find out the truth. If your intuition tells you that something is amiss, it's best to do some investigating before you confront your spouse. There are some common signs to look for if you're concerned that your spouse is being unfaithful.
- You start receiving hang up calls on the phone. The other woman might be calling to see if your husband will answer. If you don't have caller id - get it. Then you can see who the hang up calls are coming from. You may choose to call the number back and see if you recognize the voice. If you do this, call from a pay phone so that your number isn't recognized.
- Your spouse starts working a lot of hours or taking a lot of business trips. See what you can do to verify his whereabouts. If he's going out of town, be sure to get an itinerary. Try calling his room when he wouldn't expect it; maybe an hour after you've talked and said goodnight for the evening.
- He stops wearing his wedding ring. Unless he's had a big weight gain or weight loss, it's suspicious if he suddenly stops wearing his ring.
- He's not interested in sex - If his sex drive suddenly declines significantly, it could be a big sign that he's unfaithful. Some men are simply not interested in their wives sexually once they have a new partner; others feel too guilty to have sex with their wives when they're sleeping with someone else.
- He starts hiding bills. If you suddenly no longer have access to his cell phone bill, the home phone bill or his credit card bill, it could be a sign that there's something on those bills he doesn't want you to see.
- He suddenly wants to try new sexual techniques. This is a good sign that he's learning these techniques elsewhere.
- He suddenly joins a gym, or otherwise becomes more interested in his appearance. He might be interested in looking good for someone else.
- He begins to shower you with gifts. If your spouse is suddenly away from home more than usual, but brings you a gift nearly every time he does come home, he could be buying you gifts both to ease his guilt and to avoid making you suspicious.
If your spouse is demonstrating some of the above behaviors, you may have legitimate cause to worry. Take time to examine your relationship and see if there are clues as to why your spouse might be looking elsewhere; though there are certainly situations where there don't seem to be any concrete reasons why people cheat.
If you believe your spouse is cheating, it may be wise to look for some evidence before you confront him. Many cheating spouses will tell you that it's "just your imagination" when you confront them with your suspicions. If you want to get to the bottom of the situation once and for all, confronting him with evidence is the best way. Find those cell phone bills he's been hiding. Read his email. Check into his travel arrangements for those business trips.
Infidelity in a marriage is one of the most devastating things we can face. But, until you know once and for all whether or not your spouse is really cheating, you can't deal with the situation and try to recover. Intuition is often right on target; if you think something is wrong, there's a good chance you're right. So, take the time to find out what's really going on in your marriage so that you can get on with your life.
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