Checking Up on Internet Infidelity: Instant Messengers
One of the most common means of talking with people online is through instant messengers. These programs allow instant communication between two or more users. In the earliest days of IM, the messages were only text. These were quickly supplemented by the ability to send files and inline graphics to substitute for emoticons (the little smiley faces after text). Soon, webcam and voice functionality was added to the programs. Today, instant messengers such as MSN, AIM, and Yahoo! Messenger are complete communication solutions, facilitating all kinds of human interaction over the internet.
Unfortunately, these instant messengers can also be used for infidelity. Everything from secret online liaisons to webcam cybersex can be experienced through instant messengers. Commonly, cheaters will meet potential affairs in internet chat rooms in a variety of locations and then offer to chat privately via IM software. These private meetings can then involve file transfers of photographs, or even live webcam feeds.
If you have a fear that your spouse is having an online affair with the aid of instant messaging, there are ways to reveal the infidelity, particularly if your cheating spouse is careless or simply not technically gifted. The appearance of technological ignorance on your part may work to your advantage as well, particularly if he thinks that you just don't have the ability to check up on his online escapades.
But you can fool him. It's not only possible to check up on him - it's easy. By taking a look at the program's chat log, you can have a complete record of his conversations - dates and times, the who, what, when, and where of your cheating spouse.
MSN Messenger is probably the chat program favored by the majority of internet chatters. For you, MSN has the added ability to keep an indefinitely long record of chats. The option may be switched on already, or you may want to turn it on specifically for this purpose. Select Tools -> Options -> and the Messages tab.
At the bottom of the window, select a box called Message History. And conversations had through MSN will be recorded in the folder that you choose. These conversations will be saved in a .xml format, but these can be opened in Internet Explorer with ease.
If double-clicking the file doesn't open it automatically in Excel or in Internet Explorer, then go into Internet Explorer and click File -> Open -> and navigate to the location of the document. This will force Internet Explorer to open the chat log and display the complete text.
This option is relatively well buried in the inner workings of the options menu, and so you shouldn't be in danger of your spouse noticing. Even if he does notice, there would be no reason to think it was a matter of intent. Options in programs such as these change for various reasons. The worst that could happen would be that he switches the option off. But unless he deletes the files, the text of his conversations will remain intact.
If your suspicions are true, and your spouse has been cheating with the aid of an instant messenger, then save a copy of the file and print out an additional copy. Routine system cleaning, or even intentional manual deletion for privacy are all too easy to accomplish. Keep a copy of the conversation as proof if you decide to confront your spouse about his infidelity.
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